The things I would like to tell people (but usually don't)

Introductions, someone once said, are tricky things.

Okay, so no one actually said that. I said that. But it's true, isn't it? So often in this world, you only get one chance to make yourself stand out. First impressions really do matter, and I don't want to screw this up. It's like introducing myself to a room full of strangers - only worse, because this is actually an entire Internet full of strangers.

So where to start? At the risk of being unoriginal, let me start by saying my name's Paul Baranay. I was born in South Bend, Indiana - I'm pretty sure that if anyone knows about it, they know it because of Notre Dame (as in Notre Dame football). I technically now live in Michigan, which annoys me to no end, especially since my house is right on the state line. And besides, it's more fun to say I'm from South Bend.

I'm 18 and just graduated from high school - glory hallelujah for that. Next year I'll be going to MIT, which I personally regard as the best school in the world. (Of course, I'm biased.) I plan on majoring in biomedical engineering, but apparently most people change their minds once they get to college, so don't hold me to that. This summer I'm working at good old Notre Dame, doing research with cow bones...but that's a story for another day. (It's also a good line on a resume.)

So, that's the boring stuff. It's lucky I'm not in high school anymore, otherwise I'd feel obliged to talk about all the stuff I did there. In retrospect, I did too much in high school anyway. But, hey, it didn't kill me and I still have a decent social life, so I guess it's all good.

As I said, though, that's the boring stuff, the easy stuff - the things that don't really tell you much about me, about what makes me different from anyone else, because everyone says those sorts of things.

The things I would like to tell people, but usually don't, are these:

I am basically the dumbest smart person you will ever meet. I am an undercover geek, an occasional athlete, a social butterfly, an unforgivable bibliophile. I am a nerd in prep's clothing, a scholar and a gentleman, a walking dictionary. I am optimistic and ironic, cynical and sarcastic.

I am lazy and I am an over-achiever. I used to be too involved for my own good and still think I've been cured.

I count by squares when I am nervous. I am working on memorizing pi and I actually think math jokes are funny.

I want to learn Italian and insist that Latin is a useful language to know. I am basically in love with Rome.

I am a poker player and a computer addict, a Facebook stalker and a fledging blogger. I am making a list of movies I need to see before I go to college. I buy too many books and not enough music.

I believe dark chocolate is God's gift to man. I pretend I don't like going to the mall. I love Oakley sunglasses, North Face fleece, and leather jackets.

I will always be a fan of the Notre Dame football team, no matter how much I claim to hate their performance during any given season. I have mostly gotten over my hatred for USC, but I will always despise Matt Leinart and Reggie Bush. I recently converted to the Red Sox but I'd still cheer for the Colts over the Patriots.

I admire Dr. Gregory House as much as I despise the entire cast of Grey's Anatomy. I am obsessed with Harry Potter. I swear that Snape is not evil and Dumbledore is not dead. I dream of riding motorcycles and curing cancer. I think everyone could benefit from a little more dry humor.